Perception Is Reality.
Let's think about that for a moment. We might think we have control of how people perceive us. We talk a certain way or behave a certain way in order to make sure that other's perception of us is what we desire. Some do this subconsciously while others do this deliberately. What most don't realize is that it doesn't matter what we do or say, ultimately others will come to their own conclusions. If we are fortunate, it works in our favor. If not, well... things can get awkward.
I find as I get older I don't seem to stress much about what others think of me. I think the main reason for this is that I am the same person no matter what social circle I engage in. Of course if I am around older relatives or friends that are more conservative I don't drop "F Bombs" left and right but my core personality is still intact. I try to be respectful of others comfort levels but I can confidently say that if the social circles were to overlap at any given moment, the person my colleague knows and the person my best friend knows, is the same individual. I am who I am.
I recently severed ties with an individual who was the exact opposite. They wanted people to see them in a certain light. I had the opportunity to see this in action simply because this person behaved differently when they were around one group of friends vs another. I never understood why and in time it became very frustrating. I would tell them to just be themselves. Not to worry about being judged. After all multiple personalities are are a clinical condition not something you want to deliberately manifest. "I don't want them thinking things or perceiving me a certain light." Well darling, people are going to think what they want. Might as well be genuine.
Was their behavior more of what we would call "two-faced" or just a way to compartmentalize social circles? In any case, I grew tired of the Jekyll and Hyde routine and distanced myself. I want to know the person I'm spending time with not a version of what they want me to see. Ya know?